This week's Saturday Night Live had Steve Carrell has it's host. It was ok, but by far the best part came from the SNL Digital Short (I think my favorite Digital Short was "Roy Rules", go find it on youtube or Hulu or something).
Check it:
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
The Original Original
Lester Is Unstoppable
Jon Lester, pitcher for the Boston Red Sox was diagnosed with non-Hodgekins Lymphoma two years ago. That rare form of cancer, found after a minor car accident, almost killed him. Last year, he returns to pitch undefeated in the regular season and win the clinching Game 4 of the World Series. And last night, he pitched a no-hitter against the Kansas City Royals.
It was such an amazing and inspired perfomance and the celebration afterwards was incredibly moving. Below is the video - I dare you not to get chills watching it. (It could be removed at any time, so hopefully it stays up for at least a little while).
And there's also this...
Another popular internet video that I somehow completely missed is now here for your enjoyment:
What's Jon Listening to? 5.20.08 Edition
Welcome to another installment of "What's Jon Listening to?", for this, the 20th day of May in 2008. This is the section in which I, Jon, dictate to you, the Reader, what I, Jon, am listening to. Enjoy.
The Indelicates - "American Demo"
This band from England features a former member of the Pipettes (I'll let you guess who). The record, and their sound, is a bit hard to classify. It has elements of folk, pop, rock and punk. It is cleverly and boldly written, with songs like "If Jeff Buckley Had Lived" that deconstructs the notion of myth-making and the pressure an artist faces to live up to the hype. It's a great record and you should get it.
Midlake - "The Trials of Van Occupanther"
Yes, I realize that it's not 2006, which is when this record came out, and meaning that I am at least 2 years late in realizing the greatness of it. It's a record that is densely layered, intricate and beautiful. At times it sounds like it belongs in the 70's and other times like it belongs ten years in the future. It seems like it could be a concept album, telling a fictional story, but it's not easy to dissect, if it is. The opener, "Roscoe" is strong, but the best song on the record is probably "Head Home".
Sleepercar - "West Texas"
The debut record for Sparta frontman Jim Ward is a more country-oriented rock record. Quieter and less dense than a Sparta record, it allows Ward to write songs that are related more to growing up in Texas. Maybe less political and fired-up than Sparta songs, too. There's some great tracks here, my favorite probably being "Sound the Alarm". Ward also put out a solo EP last year called "Quiet", which is also great. I saw him a while back play a solo acoustic set which really blew me away. He's a talented guy and writes good music. Buy this one too.
Monday, May 19, 2008
I love Bill Murray
...and he's starring in a new movie coming out this October called "City of Ember". It's based on a novel and it looks sort of like a movie targeted towards kids, but the trailer is badass and the movie looks pretty freaking cool.
Check it.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Wow, California is smart
Finally some fucking sense. It's about time someone else joined my favorite home state of Massachusetts by getting a clue.
Today, California joined Massachusetts as the only other state in this great nation of ours to legalize gay marriage. Not civil unions or some other mildly placating bullshit - but actual, same rights as heterosexual, marriage.
The decision had words like "constitutional" and "equal rights" - apparently foreign terms to the 48 other states that have tried to (or successfully) taken some civil rights away from a group of people. The greatest part of this was that it overturned a voted ban on same-sex marriage.
Why is that the best part? BECAUSE PEOPLE SHOULDN'T BE ABLE TO VOTE TO TAKE AWAY SOMEONE'S CONSTITUTION-GIVEN CIVIL RIGHT!
Why is it a civil right? Because it says so in the fucking Bill of Rights. You do remember the Bill of Rights, don't you? You know that part that says "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are crated equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights (note: that's a capital "R", btw), that among thees are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness".
That's really all you need to see to understand that you can't take one right away from a group of people that another group has. There is no argument possible to refute this. Religious reason? Nope. See, there's another part of one of our founding documents that separates Church and State, sorry. Economic reason? Please, show me some evidence. Traditional reasons? You're surely joking.
Feel free to believe what you want to believe. You don't want to embark on a same-sex marriage yourself, then don't. But why get involved in the personal, PRIVATE lives of others when it has no effect on yours? This country was founded on the freedom to believe as you want to believe and act freely as you will as long as you're not infringing on the rights of others.
So let's all be happy and allow others to be as such.
That is all.
(UPDATE: Here is the full text of the ruling. It's a very well written and pretty easy-to-understand document that really gets to the heart of the issue. It talks about how 60 years ago, California overturned a ban on interracial marriage as being unconstitutional as well. That's an important precedent and is entirely relevant to this issue.)
High Five Action
Anyone that knows me, knows that I love high fives. What's not to love?
The satisfaction brought about by two hands, raised in defiance of all odds, meeting together in a loud CLAP that signifies unity and DESTRUCTION, raises morale and promises to vanquish obstacles.
And they cure cancer (though it's not proven, I'm confident it at least decreases cancer risk by +/- 3%).
Manny Ramirez sure loves high fives.
Oh yeah.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Daily Inspiration #2
I love Boston. I love inspired, creative videos.
Hence, I love this:
3 Days - 3,038 Photos from Robbie on Vimeo.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Things that make me angry #3241234
You know what makes me angry? This shit.
Really angry.
People that rely on the rumors and water-cooler (well, I guess in West Virginia it would probably be horse trough) gossip to make their "informed" decisions.
"I heard he was a Muslim" says one asswipe that will use his vote for Hillary "I'm way too cool to drop out of the race or give a shit about this country" Clinton and if she isn't the Democratic nominee in November, to vote for John "I'm really old and out of touch with this country, but i was a POW so vote for me!" McCain.
How about instead of relying on the Mainstream Media to make your decisions for you, you do some actual research before utilizing one of the last remaining avenues to have your voice heard. I know voting may not seem like it makes a difference, but it really, truly does. Votes are the only thing that can finally cut through the bullshit that TV news dishes. Votes are the only thing that can make some sort of dent in the shitty political system that we currently have.
One vote makes a difference. Just please make it an informed one.
I wanna rock! (ROCK!)
Big news people: A fifth(!) day has been added to Rocklahoma!
Seriously!
Rocklahoma is a music festival featuring all pop metal bands, mostly from the 80's, in Oklahoma. It was started last year and over 100,000 people trekked to the Oklahoma prairie to ROCK!
This year there is FIVE FULL DAYS of rocking. And I need to go.
Bands include: Warrant, Kix, Brett Michels (of Poison), Sebastian Bach (of Skid Row, obviously), Dokken, LA Guns, Queensryche and so many others.
Anyone that knows me (and those of you that read the post on Def Leppard) will know that I love metal, and especially cheesy metal. I love Dragonforce. I love Mastodon. I love 80's metal. Unfortunately Dragonforce or Mastodon will not be at Rocklahoma as that would kill the spirit of the festival. BUT, there is FIVE FULL DAYS of 80's metal bands.
That means:
FIVE FULL DAYS of bands wanting to play new material while the crowd yells for their one big hit they had in 1986.
FIVE FULL DAYS of 45 year old men staring at 45 year old women and wondering if while Warrant sings "Heaven" they might get away with feeling them up.
FIVE FULL DAYS of middle aged men wondering if it's too late to "rock out with their cock out". (I do not support this or the use of this phrase.)
FIVE FULL DAYS of me wondering if I'm the youngest person there and then noticing that I'm in Oklahoma and there are at least 300 8-12 year olds with mullets and/or rat tails.
I need to find a way to go to this. Donations are accepted in cash/check/Paypal. Email me for details.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Muggles no more
Well, Florida, you are totally awesome.
Apparently, a substitute teacher in Florida was fired for wizardry.
Yes, wizardry.
As reported by Tampa Bay Channel 10, a sub was entertaining the class with a 30 second magic trick that involved a toothpick disappearing and reappearing. Clearly this is the work of some vile wizard. No mere mortal can make a toothpick disappear into the soulless ether and then MAGICALLY COME BACK!
The best part of this whole thing is that the reason cited for his dismissal wasn't lack of proper teaching or not following curriculum. Nope, it was WIZARDRY. Someone had to sit down and tell this man with a straight face, "You've been accused of wizardry".
The more I write about this the less I believe it. This isn't 17th century Salem where accusing people of illicit deals with the devil was more accepted. I find it hard to believe that the devil has much interest in lending some power to a middle school sub so that he can make a toothpick disappear...but that's just my humble opinion.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Pour some SUCK on me (what? too obvious?)
Last Tuesday an event occurred that somehow escaped my attention. This was a serious oversight on my part, and I am truly, truly sorry.
Def Leppard released a new record.
Wow.
I don't even know where to begin.
Def Leppard, for those of you that somehow don't know, are a British Heavy Metal band from England, started in 1977. They "peaked" (yes, they were pretty huge for a while) in the early to mid 80's before embarking on a muti-year journey attempting to record what they hoped would be their biggest record, "Hysteria", which suffered many setbacks, not least of which was their drummer lost an arm.
But that didn't stop them! Not the Leppard, as I have never called them once. Their drummer (Rick Allen for those of you keeping score at home) learned to play with one arm and an elaborate pedal system, and "Hysteria" went on to sell four billion copies (maybe somewhat of an exaggeration).
They released a record of new material in 2002 and it sucked. Really bad. Though I did see them in concert at a state fair(!) in 2000 or so and they played only old stuff and not one new song, which was nice. Especially since they do have some fun, hair metal songs like "Rocket", "Photograph" and of course the crowd-pleaser "Pour Some Sugar On Me". But the key phrase there is "Old stuff". New stuff should never be written, let alone recorded and released into the public. This is a band who's musical style was nearly outdated when it began in the 80's. I mean, let me be honest, I love 80's metal (thanks college roommate Neil), but that sound belongs squarely in that time period. Attempts to resurrect it and forge a new sound nearly always ends in complete and utter humiliation (see: Brett Michaels).
Which brings us to "Songs from the Sparkle Lounge" Really? That's the title you're going with guys? Ok.
Allegedly they were going to make this record with their longtime producer "Mutt" Lange, with whom they collaborated on "Hysteria" to tons and tons of cash and sex with women. (Side note: On tour, they would often perform "in the round", on a circular stage with a green room below stage. In this green room, groups of groupies were hanging out and during extended solos bands members would head below stage and receive a little boost before resuming their difficult jobs of rocking everyone's faces off.) BUT, Mutt was too busy and they had to settle on some other guy who thought it would be a great idea to get Tim McGraw to come on board and lend some vocals to a boring song. Woo, worthless country crossover!
Anyway, this record isn't very good. Obviously. There are a couple of their signature slow ballads, lots of soaring vocals and guitars but there is too much of an attempt to make their sound fit in with the radio-ready modern rock that bands like Nickelback and Shittastank put out on a yearly basis. I understand the desire to want to keep on rockin', but there's a point where you have to realize the best thing to do is to keep touring on the old material and fade off into the sunset, counting your ridiculous piles of money. No one needs a new Def Leppard album, my copy of "Hysteria" and "High and Dry" still sound just fine on my ipod.
And I'm not going to comment on the way they spell their band's name.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Cinco De Mayo!
Happy Mexican Independence Day* everyone! Oh, wait, no it's not.
Cinco De Mayo is actually mostly an Americanized holiday that has some, but not a ton of significance in Mexico. It's yet another day that Americans can feel like they are contributing to world culture by getting drunk and misinterpreting cultural meanings!
So drink another Corona in honor of General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguin's victory over French forces in 1862, but just not Mexican Indepdendence.
*Fun Fact: Mexican Independence Day is actually on September 16! Drink some Coronas then!
Friday, May 2, 2008
Walk like a New Yorker
New York is a grand place. It's full of all kinds of people, income levels, entertainment and lots and lots of garbage. It's also home to the biggest garbage dump in the world (I'm looking at you New York Yankees).
One thing that's quite different than other places is the distinctly different styles of walking that this city offers. And below, I will highlight the three major types:
1. New York City Resident (Fast)
If you live here in New York and are under the age of 90, you generally have someplace to be and need to get there NOW. And if you don't get there NOW, some horrible fate will befall you, your loved ones and everyone you've ever met. Or at the very least you'll miss out on the free can of Rockstar that they're giving out on the corner (which is equally horrific).
So the type of walk that typifies an NYC resident is FAST. They weave. They bob. They speed through the crowds like Star Jones is hot on their tail. And they get to their destination fast and in style.
2. Old New York City Resident (Slow)
For those above the age of 90, the pace slows down noticeably. They think they're walking fast, but really, they're not.
3. Tourist (REALLY SLOW)
If you thought it wasn't possible to walk slower than the pace of a geriatric marathon, boy, you've never been to NYC in the height of tourist season. "Oh, look, a homeless person, I've heard about those, let's take a picture." "Oh look, a pigeon, take a picture!" "Oh look, I didn't know Wall Street was in New York, take a picture". "Oh look, some people from the South are racially profiling me, take a picture".
Do you get the point?
There's no slower way to walk than a tourist in this city. Every step is like an adventure to them. A long, dumb adventure.
I understand that New York City is an interesting place and definitely a place to see before you die. But please just have a little respect for the people that live and work here. While you're taking an hour to walk four blocks in a massive tour group, I'm trying to get to work on time.
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